My brother-in-law is a comedian and he travels the country performing as Tim The Dairy Farmer (https://agcomedian.com/ ). It is hard to compete with him because he is so quick wit. Whenever, I come up with a great one-liner, he is already way ahead of me and is already saying it just as I was about to. But today, is my day. I have some great cow jokes and one-liners that only us “cow lovers” will truly appreciate. ENJOY.
JOKES
What do you call a cow that can’t make milk? A milk dud.
What did the mama cow say to the baby cow? It’s pasture bedtime!
What did one dairy cow say to the other? Got Milk?
How do you count cows? With a cowculator!
What happens when you try talking to a cow? Everything just goes in one ear and out the udder.
Where do cows eat lunch? In the calfeteria.
What do you call a cow going though an earthquake? A milkshake.
Why can’t cows wear shoes? Because they lactose.
You know what they say about cows…they’re outstanding in their field.
What do you call a cow in your backyard? A lawn-mower.
Why do cows have bells? Because their horns don’t work.
PUNS
I am udderly in love with you!
The steaks are high.
Seize the moo-ment!
Holy cow!
Cow bells make such beautiful moosic.
I drive by your pasture almost every day and seeing which verse you choose is always a highlight of my day. Thank you for doing this, it is really uplifting!
Thank you so much Rick.
I love that you have kept some nature and animal life in this ever developing county. Thank you for your verses. They are inspirational.
Thank you PJ. The cows still like it here but occasionally they do get “mooo-dy” with all of the traffic. Have a great weekend.